Suicide - A Dead End Street (I)

Suicide - A Dead End Street (I) To be honest, for the first time ever since I started blogging two years ago, I am not quite sure how to start this topic and get the ball rolling although I feel the need to bring it up every now and then. Two weeks back I was talking about my last Christmas' blues after having lost two friends among other things. One of them, a former colleague of mine, had quite surprisingly committed suicide. This news hit me like a bomb as it usually always does most likely because I, too, have been plagued by suicidal tendencies throughout my whole life. Anyway, as I was just starting to somehow come to terms with that loss, once more out of nowhere it struck me again like a lightening bolt. This time it wasn't anyone I had personally known but rather a small- scale US celebrity. She was the only one really sticking out while participating in a famous TV- dating show and even long after that. Someone as charismatic and likable as her who seemed to have it all going for her abruptly decided to terminate her life and hanged herself just like that. I'm completely blown away! The Why will most probably never be revealed. - More than four years ago I was sent the obituary of one of my all- time favorite ex- students. Even though they say that time eventually heals all wounds, I feel the time ever since has very well muffled but certainly not eased the pain. At 24 that girl had a great boy- friend and a healthy child. Literally her whole life was lying ahead of her, and yet she got up some morning, went to the back of her house and hanged herself. I remember as if it was only yesterday that just a few years prior I had been standing in front of her class rambling on about suicide and its grave karmic consequences on more than one occasion. As persuasively as I thought I might have driven the point of my monologue home, as miserable a failure my mission appeared to have turned out to be. One of the brightest and most charismatic students ever that she was, she was just laughing at me back then. Getting word years later of her suicide felt like a flash back plus a hard slap across my face. I am quite aware that by simply not being super woman, I could impossibly have prevented her or anyone else's suicide, nor will I ever claim to be able to.
However, if I can get my message across which is clearly colored by my own battle scars, I may perhaps bring a change of heart upon future desperados. Several times already I have seen, heard and witnessed myself what the aftermath of suicide looks like. Mostly younger folks end their lives once that overwhelming pain gets out of hand. In lots of cases those emotionally tormented individuals seemingly lack nothing whatsoever - at least at first sight. A much closer look though, may slowly reveal how much they actually suffer from invisible pain - be it because they feel obligated to save the whole world or because they do not love themselves and consequently cannot reciprocate the affection they get from the outside. The third group throws the towel due to issues they feel can no longer be overcome altogether. A single soul hardly ever manages to bring major positive change upon our rotten world. Therefore all those who think of themselves as the chosen ones for this impossible job must learn to refrain from this highly destructive way of thinking. All those who feel unworthy and unloved are called upon to do some serious soul- searching. We cannot expect ever to be loved unless we learn to love ourselves. We shan't listen to others as far as this very personal lesson but are instead advised to turn inwards and discover the divine spark which dwells in each and every one. We are all unique and special and should never allow anyone to take this away from us. 
To all those who may irrationally conclude from the kind of mess they are either temporarily or constantly surrounded by that life is just not worth being continued any longer, let me address these words. Nothing should ever become or be made a legitimate reason to kill oneself, neither emotionally nor physically. Suicide as an answer to mental turmoils though sadly often occurs without the sufferers being in their right mind. No doubt, people who feel trapped in occasional, periodical or permanent depressions need professional help first and foremost. From a spiritual point of view, however, they should also reflect for a minute or two on what a huge void their irreversible actions will leave in the lives of their families and friends. Doing so, they may hopefully gain the insight that a selfish step like this is just not fair to all those left behind. Moreover, there is always a solution no matter what the problem is. - Next time I'll be discussing suicide from a totally different angle which might surprise some of you. Until then keep your eyes and ears open to anyone around you seriously screaming for help.